The Last Petition

(His Gentle Voice, 09/11/2013 prophecy) “Much is in the balances, including your families. Satan has requested many of them and I ask you to counter him in My Court.”

As the Lord, Himself has declared, “much” is in the balances. We see our families included in that statement, but they are not all that hangs in the balances. There are many other souls hanging there too. Satan’s time is short, and he knows it. He is stepping up His game. Is it time for the bride to step up hers?

In obedience to our Bridegroom, and out of concern for our loved ones, we each petition individually for our family members. But, what then can we do collectively, as one body in further obedience to our Lord? How can we fill the highest courtroom of heaven with the sound of our one-voice; a humble yet bold song pleasing to the Judge, sung with as much passion and power as we are given to sing it! Isn’t it high time that we pulled out all the stops and put a huge smile on the face of our Bridegroom as we execute His last request before this last great harvest with every ounce of our faith? For, much hangs in the balances!

I have never constructed a petition before, but I tried my hand at writing one anyway. If anyone feels guided by the Spirit to improve on it, please do it now.

Let’s call it the “Matthew 22:39 — Second Greatest Commandment” petition. “Love your neighbor as yourself.” For, after the last great harvest is in, and the door is shut, those left behind (the lost and those foolish bridesmaids) will experience torment and terror never before known on Earth, and if they should die before coming to faith without the aid of the Holy Spirit, then they will perish into even greater torment for eternity. What if that were us? What if we are the ones who Satan is petitioning to kill and take to hell before being allowed the fullness of our last two opportunities for salvation; harvest or Tribulation?

As the bride, should we not be about our Bridegroom’s business? What does our Bridegroom desire? Isn’t it that not one of His precious, dearly-loved children should perish? There will never be a time like this again! This is it! This is our time to be bold before the Judge and ask BIG!!!

Let us take this petition (with improvements as the Spirit wills) and cry out with all our hearts, with every ounce of hope and trust and love. And let us fully believe that we, as one-body WILL receive it!


Father, we come to you earnestly in spirit and in truth to present our petition. But first, we repent of all our sins, including those previously unacknowledged because of our ignorance. For, we fully and humbly acknowledge that we are but little children fighting imperfectly against our sinful nature. We ask that You would please forgive us and wash us clean with the blood of your precious Son, Yahushua (which means “God saves”). Please grant us a pure heart, and make us white as snow; holy, righteous and blameless in Your eyes. We also declare before You, oh holy God, that we forgive absolutely everyone, including those on who’s behalf we are about to petition. Like Your beloved Stephen, we ask that no sinful act committed against us be held against them in Your courts, lest it adversely affect their chance for eternal life. Next, we humbly ask for the faith to fully believe, eliminating any and all lingering doubts in You, in Your word of truth and in ourselves. (Hebrews 11:6) For, You keep Your every word, and all Your love, promises and miracles apply to each of us as much as anyone. We also ask to be generously granted the wisdom to make our petition successful, knowing that You WILL give it as You have promised. (James 1:5-8 )

Your Honor, as Your precious children, citizens of Your kingdom, bought with a high price by your Son, our Bridegroom, we by legal right boldly approach Your throne of Grace, the highest court in all of heaven, and in accordance with Your will, submit our petition as instructed by Your Son. May our sincere efforts please You greatly, Your Honor.

We petition You now, on behalf of every one of Your children living on the Earth who are or will be at risk of eternal death; whether lost, strayed, disobedient or luke-warm, such that they could be among the following: (1) any and all who would be saved, if allowed to live until they are shown the true condition of their soul and Your great mercy and unconditional love during the last great harvest period, though they may delay even unto the very gates of hell, and (2) any and all who, if allowed to live, would at some point during the Great Tribulation period in faith be willing to sacrifice their lives in loyalty to Your Son. You know intimately the name and life of every one of these souls for whom we petition.

We now boldly ask to stand in the gap for all of these, whether they be our own family members, our friends, people about whom we know or complete strangers. For, they are all your children and precious to You, to Your Son and to us, His bride.

We willingly take responsibility for all their sins and repent on their behalf. We ask that You please forgive them and humbly beg that You give all their lives over to Your Son and give NOT ONE to His enemy. And furthermore, we boldly ask that You no longer entertain ANY of Satan’s petitions to end the lives of any of these souls prior to their salvation.

We come forward with this bold petition, knowing that with You all things are possible (Matthew 19:26) and that You can do infinitely more than we can ask or imagine. (Ephesians 3:20) Therefore, we know that what we ask is a very, very, very simple thing for You to accomplish.

We beseech You to spare all their lives in consideration of their future repentance and faith unto salvation. We ask that You pour out Your greatest act of grace now in preparation for, and as a prelude to, Your greatest act of mercy — the last great harvest.

Let all those for whom we petition one day declare, “While we were still deaf and disobedient, while we yet sided with Your enemy in blind rebellion, You, our God, heard us speak these future words, ‘Oh Lord, You have judged our case and redeemed our very lives.’ (Lamentations 3:58 ) You considered the petition of those who stood in the gap for us, the very ones we disregarded, and You granted their petition of repentance and blotted out our transgressions for Your namesake. (Isaiah 43:25) How glorious is the love of our God! How mighty is the name of the Holy One of Israel!”

Thank You, Father for hearing and granting our petition. For, whatever thing we ask when we pray, believing that we have received it, then we WILL have it. (Mark 11:24) And, we as the bride have asked.

In the name of your Son, Yahushua, Jesus Christ of Nazareth we pray this petition — Amen.

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Armor Lessons – Satan’s Mirrors

The Ugly Truth:

(The Sparrow’s Dreams, Dream 44) “The spirit of Elijah does not come in comfort like the spirit of a Hivite. He is not a prophet of comfort, but truth.

At some point during my life, I am wondering if the Lord offered me either divine wisdom or the spirit of Elijah (or maybe even both), though I am not at all certain. But long ago, He did put in me an intense desire to see the truth, even the ugly truth — yet entirely free of condemnation. Yea! (I have heard that this is a strong Asperger’s trait?) It truly is amazingly easy to see the ugly truth about ourselves when there is no accompanying sense of condemnation.

(John 14:6) “I am the way and the truth and the life…

Does the heart of our Lord only accept the “pretty” truth? I think not. I believe Him to be the God of “all” truth, which includes the ugly truth. Yet, His enemy does not want us to grow close to Him in spirit and in truth. (The Action: Judgment, The Sentence: Condemnation, The Verdict: Rejection) Is not “rejection” the very sting that causes us to fear the action of judgment and the sentence of condemnation? Is not the “fear” of the sting of rejection a tool that Satan uses to convince us to run from, hide from or fight against facing the ugly truth about ourselves?

(John 3:17) “For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.

Yet, Jesus is so gentle and kind, humble and mild, and does not reject any of His children during their brief lesson of good and evil simply because they all sin and fall short. As ambassadors of His kingdom, should we not also live this way? As fellow sparrows in the Lord’s barn, should we not also trust and expect this from one another?

I love seeing and talking openly about the ugly truth without any condemnation what-so-ever. Standing free, fully transparent in the light-of-truth without fear of rejection, feels wonderful (so good). I very-much wish you all could experience this the way I do. Maybe some of you can. Maybe some of you have? Sadly, I have learned that many can not. The enemy very often causes even those I deeply care about to hear judgmental words which I never spoke…

Demonic Filters: (A Flanking Maneuver)

(Retah Mcpherson Newsletter 07/20/2013) “When unresolved issues -or- anger, known or unknown, reside in our hearts, it makes us listen through demonic filters. These filters distort our perceptions. In all Yeshua’s love He told me that nothing will just disappear, no!  ‘Ask My Glory light in those painful memories and allow Me to show you the lies that you believed, the judgments that are still in your heart, and then allow Me to show you the truth – because only My truth will set you free.’…But, we have so much pride that we do not want to face our pain and allow Holy Spirit to reveal and work with the pain and lies.

Words of truth are not always comfortable for us to hear. But from me and others like me, these words are “not” spoken in judgment or condemnation of anyone. They are spoken as an act of bold, selfless love with the ever-undying hope of spiritual growth and ultimately — victory. There is no rejection accompanying such words. Yet, at the very same moment that someone’s well-meaning words approach us from head-on, spirits of fear, insecurity or pride will immediately whisper to us from the side. This is known as a flanking maneuver. These flanking spirits are acting as “filters”, attempting to distort our perception the instant any very-personal or sensitive words are communicated to us, encouraging us to read-between-the-lines and make negative assumptions about “why” these words were spoken, tempting us to become hurt — and even — to hurt back…

Being Used As An Enemy Weapon:

(July 21, 2013 Prophecy received by Susan Davis) “Forgive those around you for the way the enemy has worked through them to cause you pain.  Although you suffer, it is at the hand of the enemy more than those around you. They are just weak, because they do not have the Power of MY HOLY SPIRIT to ward off sin and walk perfect in MY Will.

Have not we all been used as an enemy weapon at times? Does not every one of us know the regret of words loosely spoken in reaction? It better befits us as warriors to “first” closely examine our feelings and carefully weigh the truthfulness of the very thoughts that caused them. This kind of introspection the Holy Spirit of God can empower us to do. Let us all continually ask and reach out for those valuable fruits of the Spirit known as “patience” and “self-control”, and then seek to see the “whole truth” in our midst, rather than allowing ourselves to unthinkingly react instead, lest to our shame a fiery arrow be shot from our mouth yet again.

Taking Thoughts Captive: (Battling Against Reacting To Assumptions)

(2 Corinthians 10:5) “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

It matters not if the thoughts we encounter are (1) flanking thoughts, attempting to “filter” someone’s well-meaning words of “ugly truth” (whether imparted lovingly or “imperfectly”), or (2) flanking thoughts that are pushing us hard to thoughtlessly retaliate against someone who is being used as a hurtful enemy weapon, or (3) just thoughts that appear in our mind out of the blue. Taking captive every thought means — “every” thought — (as exhausting as that sounds). How willing and determined are we to fight for Jesus against His enemy in these last days? There will never come a time to fight for God like this again. So, how do we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ?

Obviously, as a simple child of God, a warrior in training myself, I lack the fullness of understanding to answer that question. But, I have a sneaking suspicion that this just might be one of those questions who’s answer is uniquely tailored to each of us. However, my first bits of universal advice to prepare us for this process would be: “Close your mouth and slow way down.” (Philippians 4:6) “Be anxious about nothing; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.” Don’t allow the enemy to successfully goad you into acting or speaking according to his will, for his purposes. Seek to consistently operate only from a spirit of patience and gentle peace. Now, let’s continue as if from there…

For me, Satan’s whispers are so silent and subtle that his “lying gossip” often enters in as rapid, half-concious thoughts. It has been my personal experience that, when requested through prayer, the Holy Spirit will diligently alert me to these lightning-fast enemy thoughts right away (waking me up to them) so that I may learn to recognize them and quickly disregard them, tossing them away. (James 4:7) “Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” (Then, I quickly move on without even pausing to dwell on what the enemy just tried to pull. I focus instead on my Coach, Jesus, and His victory-smile.)

But sometimes, as Satan probes for holes in our spiritual armor, his lying gossip is allowed by the Coach to enter in unnoticed (without us receiving Holy-Spirit alarm bells). This would still not be a problem, if our awareness of where we reside (with the enemy in our midst) is constant, and we are habitually wise in the careful consideration of our thoughts before believing them. For, the words of a lying gossip can do us no harm until they are believed, right? Believing gossip without proof is a very dangerous kind of “assumption” that can have devastating and even deadly consequences, ending relationships and even lives. I wrote the following blog post last October about assumptions:

Journal Entry, October 16, 2012: Assumptions

It is vital that we hold our every thought captive (interrogating it like a prisoner) and throw it out if it is untrue, rebellious, unloving or in any other way disobedient to our Lord and unfit for the His kingdom. But, what about those moments-of-weakness when a thought that is not obedient to Christ remains on-the-loose, causing painful damage, tempting us to emotionally react like an unthinking animal…

Finding The Holes: (The Awareness And Habits Of A Warrior In Training)

Starting in dream five of The Sparrow’s Dreams, the Lord has instructed us more than twenty times to “prepare”, “reinforce”, “put on” and “keep on” our “whole” spiritual armor, so that on the battlefield we can withstand the enemy’s attacks and hold our ground for the Lord. But, until we are perfected, our armor will have weak spots and holes, and the enemy’s fiery arrows will penetrate.

One perhaps rather obvious training technique, which I long-ago learned will readily identify freshly exploited holes in our spiritual armor, is yet another technique of awareness and discipline, and it begins by not allowing ourselves to blindly react to any sudden change in our heart (caused by the painful penetration of a fiery arrow), and habitually give in to our feelings without first considering them very carefully. For, we are very often defiled by the words that suddenly come out of our mouth (Matthew 15:11), turning us into an ugly weapon of the enemy, giving him further advantage in the heat of battle. Instead, as part of our ongoing training, we should earnestly and consistently exercise those fruits of the Spirit known as “patience” and “self-control”, using them to form within ourselves the new warrior-habit of always checking our feelings first, giving ourselves time to examine our heart closely and honestly, looking for evidence of “tampering by the enemy”…

The Tampering: (Evidence Of A Successfully Exploited Hole)

If our primary line-of-defense is weakened, and we allow ourselves to believe attacking thoughts without careful consideration, then they are immediately taken-to-heart, and the condition of our heart instantly changes, causing “signature” feelings to rise up (flavors of fear, anger, shame, hurt, etc.). It’s important that we know our enemy and his tactics, and certain feelings that suddenly appear in our heart are the telltale signature of his tampering thoughts, his fiery darts that were not held captive, but — penetrated.

Blindly giving in to these feelings without thinking can quickly lead us to react in ways that disappoint God, even temporarily turning us into an enemy weapon…

Filling In The Holes:

By patiently taking the time to be deeply honest (transparent) with ourselves about our feelings and closely examining the believed-thoughts that caused them, we can more readily identify our weaknesses and set them at Jesus’ feet. This seems to me to be the primary purpose for our Coach allowing some of Satan’s fiery arrows to penetrate. I believe that God is generously providing us with (non-judgmental) opportunities to realize our vulnerabilities and strengthen our armor.

Faithfully examine your feelings, then honestly (and non-judgmentally) consider the validity of all the thoughts that led to them. See for yourself if the enemy didn’t just find a vulnerability (a hole) through which to convince you to believe (and take-to-heart) a lie or even a half-truth without “first” (a) diligently seeking any real proof, or (b) inquiring of the Lord, or (c) relying on God’s word to powerfully expose any non-truth. The key to filling in an exploited hole is to carefully study the fiery arrow that exposed it and willingly (non-judgmentally) see the “whole truth” about yourself, even though it may be uncomfortable. (The spirit of Elijah does not come in comfort. The spirit of Elijah is serious and always for our good.)

(The Sparrow’s Dreams, Dream 25) “Children are closest to me — closest to My Heart!…When they become older, the world drains truth. The darkness veils the good…Further, those closest to My heart, are those that choose to live in full Truth — not believing half truths. Half-truths are fuel for every kind of deception.

(Page 20 of the book, “The Bondage Breaker” by Neil T. Anderson) “If Satan can deceive you into believing what the Scripture says isn’t true, you will live as though it isn’t. People are in bondage to the lies they believe.

(Proverbs 4:20-23) “Pay attention to what I say; listen closely to my words. Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart…Guard your heart, for out of it comes the Well spring (the issues) of Life.

When the above three verses are considered in whole, don’t they, in fact, speak of keeping God’s words of truth in our heart and carefully guarding (shielding) our heart from becoming wounded by lies? Is this not the very essence of spiritual warfare? Isn’t holding tightly in faith to God’s truth in our heart, a mighty shield against the painful lying-arrows of the enemy?

(The Sparrow’s Dreams, Dream 23) “Sometimes wounds can cut to the very core of our spirit. Please don’t allow yourself to become part of the lies.

Once an assumption is made (a lie is believed by our soul) it is immediately taken-to-heart and the wound to our spirit can be extreme and very long-lasting, our bondage, very heavy as we become enslaved by the lie. How many times have little children been deeply damaged by the thought, “I somehow caused the bad thing that happened in my family”? Where was their defense against such a lie? Where is your defense? Are we not all still little children in spirit?

Building Up Our Defense:

Though it is too late once a fiery dart has slipped past (a lie is believed, taken to heart and the painful-damage done), we should still take the time to carefully and honestly examine the thoughts that attacked us (the protruding dart). Whenever we examine our thoughts, specific words of God living in our heart should rise up to defend us and identify the lies. (Is this not the miracle of fertile soil?) If not, then prayer, sharing our pain openly in trusting fellowship and Holy Spirit led study of the word will strengthen our armor with more of God’s truth. The Lord will lead us to what we need if we ask Him.

Never hide from or deny the success of an enemy dart out of shame, pride or fear of judgment. But instead, boldly stare the experience square in the face, for it is simply a teaching moment. In sincere humility, be deeply honest with yourself about your vulnerability. Ask the Lord for help, and openly share the experience with those who love you. Listen for the Lord to speak — even through others.

(Page 111 of the free ebook, “Left Behind After The Rapture” by Susan Davis) “I speak through MY people, MY messengers, MY signs, MY Word.

Remember, not only is our struggle “not” against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12), but we, ourselves are the very battlefield of this war (The Sparrow’s Dreams, Dream 52) and sometimes even an enemy weapon. The more we are willing to admit to ourselves, and take to the Lord, the uncomfortable truth about our weaknesses, the closer we will be to the heart of the Lord, and through humility and complete surrender, the stronger will be our armor.

Satan’s Mirrors:

For the remainder of this topic, I am purposefully limiting its scope to a discussion focused solely on reinforcing our armor against one specific kind of insidious, spiritual attack; the “self-worth” attack. This attack is perpetrated by Satan using words spoken into our mind that are designed to act like a mirror, compelling us to turn inward and focus on ourselves, tempting us to manipulate our own sense of self-worth.

We have all been tested by this type of attack at nearly every stage of our lives, and many of us still seem quite vulnerable to it. This is always evident by the fruits of our focus, a focus on “self”. And, what’s worse, after a while we will form the habit of holding these mirrors up to ourselves. This is a nasty habit that, through the Lord’s power, His bride must now break.

From my observations over a lifetime, I have come to recognize that these mirrors of the enemy come in two flavors designed to take full advantage of one particular vulnerability; an improperly anchored self-image. Satan attempts to either inflate our self-worth or deflate our self-worth through suggestive manipulation of our self-image. To me, changing our self-worth in either direction is proof that we have just believed a lie. Our worth does not change in the eyes of God.

Ask the Holy Spirit to faithfully alert you when this happens, even to the slightest degree, so that you will learn to recognize these mirrors and can forcefully turn them away and refocus on the loving eyes of Jesus.

(Page 70 of the free ebook, “The Final Call” by Deborah Melissa Moller) “Whatever you feast your eyes on, will grow. If you focus on Me and look at Me, I will grow inside of you as a giant. When you focus on news and earthly happenings, on what you perceive as the truth, then that will grow. What you are, whatever is in your heart, will come out.

I see this as why it is so dangerous to look into Satan’s mirrors. We should not focus on ourselves and listen to his words.

Deflating Self-worth:

Her neighbor said, “Thank you for the cookies, but I don’t care for oatmeal raisin.” But, in her mind she heard flanking-words that said, “She doesn’t want your cookies because they are awful! She’s just too nice to say so. You are a terrible cook, which means you are a total failure as a woman!” (Ooh! Harsh!)

When we allow Satan to successfully implant thoughts, pointing a deflating mirror at our self-worth, and we cave-in to them, taking his lying gossip to heart, we automatically engage in a self-destructive “self-evaluation” process that tears down our own worth to the degree that “we” judge is justified. (How insidious is that?) With this particular weakness (hole in our armor) all Satan has to do is point this distorting mirror, and we will very often take over from there (a) through the bad habit of believing (taking to heart) his lying gossip without first seeking the powerful defense of God’s word or carefully considering any proof (gathering truthful witnesses), (b) then by giving in to our hurt without any internal reflection, failing to recognize these “signature” feelings as evidence of tampering by the enemy, (c) and finally, though our own “negative self-judgment”, we wrongly pass sentence against our own worth, some of the fruits of this being self-criticism, self-deprecation, self-condemnation and even self-hatred and self-mutilation. Each of these fruits clearly betrays to us our focus on “self”. Each of these fruits is clear evidence of the success of a deflating mirror.

Do you see how we have three opportunities to become aware of this deflating mirror, this particular mirror-class of fiery arrow? — first by our thoughts, then by our resulting feelings, then by our resulting focus on “self”.

First and foremost, God’s word is our mighty defender, popping up through the fertile soil of our heart to expose Satan’s lies. It is a powerful warrior-habit to arrest every thought (take it captive) and judge it by the word of God. Develop this habit with prayer and see for yourself if your heart doesn’t leap right up with a defending seed-of-truth as quick as lightning to crush the power of an enemy lie! But, what if we are poor in some part of the word and nothing comes to our defense? Then we should also maintain the warrior-habit of always seeking proof before accepting anything as truth, lest we believe lying gossip. Secondly, we should maintain the warrior-habit of examining our feelings when they suddenly change, recognizing those that are the signature of penetration by the enemy and then back-tracking to the very thoughts that caused them. Our third line of defense is to maintain the warrior-habit of checking our focus. Is it on ourselves? Has our self-worth changed at all?

Now, let’s consider this special mirror-class of fiery arrow once more, only this time let’s throw in a little pride. The presence of pride will not allow us to give in to a deflating mirror. It will fight against this mirror — but not in a good way.

For example, the moment you realize that you may have hurt someone, do you (1) see only the other person’s pain, feel desperate to apologize and long to ease their suffering and fully restore them? Or, do you (2) find that your primary focus is on yourself, on the fact that you may now be responsible for having hurt someone and feel a strong desire to desperately search for any excuse to relieve yourself of that responsibility, or simply avoid the issue, never apologizing? Do you find yourself dwelling on the negative way in which that person might see you now (imagined judgment), thus further opening a door for Satan to whisper, filling you with negative assumptions, creating a long-standing barrier of awkwardness and silence in the relationship? This is the evidence of pride’s fighting-reaction to a deflating mirror, in its desperate attempt to preserve a poorly anchored self-image.

Don’t you see? As in (1), true humility will always immediately apologize. True humility does not see itself or even notice the mirrors.

(Susan Davis – Revelation Notes) “The LORD revealed to me about Satan saying: that he went wrong when he turned away from GOD to the creation to receive admiration from the creation and he became fully prideful which is the root of all evil.  The LORD says that no one can be turning to and facing GOD all the time and remain prideful—you are only humble when you face GOD and humility is the root of all love.

Condemnation Thru Failure: (A Favored Deflating Mirror)

So what if we failed this time? Everything is a learning experience, a teaching moment. Whenever I fail, which is often, I humbly and sincerely thank God for that opportunity and boldly ask for many more opportunities within which to fail until I succeed. I feel a rising determination to see and take-to-heart that which the Lord is lovingly trying to teach me. (In truth, the lesson is always more important that the failure.)

We must routinely turn away Satan’s deflating mirror of condemnation pointed at our self-worth, clearly seeing it as a blatant attempt to stagnate our spiritual growth. We must not take the bait and judge ourselves, following him into that deception. We must not become intimidated and sit back in safety, but boldly continue stepping out in love, risking further mistakes so that we can be fully trained now, while there is still time. — We must never run from an ugly truth that may have caused a failure, but face it with total, loving self-acceptance.

Inflating Self-worth:

When our pride responds to Satan’s inflating self-worth mirror-attack, some of the fruits of this are self-importance, self-righteousness, self-praise, self-aggrandizing and self-exaltation. Again, each of these fruits clearly betrays to us our focus on “self”. Each of these fruits is clear evidence of the use of a pride-puffing mirror.

(The Sparrow’s Dreams, Dream 57) “When you are given gifts by faith, you are not to focus on yourself (mirror) but on me and the miracle. If you focus on your greatness to perform them , you will lose your authority given by me to administer them to others. You must humble yourselves, receive and remain authoritatively humble under the leading of the Holy Spirit! You are to be no longer conscious of yourselves (mirror), but a willing vessel to be filled with God’s Glory. Your own glory cannot dwell with God! People will try to glorify you (mirror), but you remain only yielding to the Holy Spirit in all things, understand? Do not act on your own authority by faith in yourself, as you are not God.

Here we can see that we are called to remain sober and vigilant to Satan’s mirrors. This is a warning. He “will” attempt to take us down, to corrupt us through the weakness of our pride. We should be taking this to the Lord now, asking for enough opportunities to fully test and practice sincere humility, and to practice recognizing and turning away these mirrors. It is Jesus’ desire to fully prepare us so that, when we are called, we will no longer be conscious of ourselves, we will no longer even see Satan’s mirrors.

The True Self-image:

It is my opinion that Satan’s ability to easily shine mirrors and successfully manipulate our self-worth boils down to a particular flaw; an improperly anchored self-image, one that is either internally dependent on “our” current opinion of ourselves, or externally based on how “we” perceive others might currently see us. Either way, our image of ourselves is always being habitually “evaluated” through our own eyes (through our own easily influenced judgment), rather than being firmly and unwaveringly grounded on how the Lord sees us, and rooted in His word. It is God, Himself, who permanently defines our true worth. We should keep focused on His eyes on us and not on that of anyone else, especially our own eyes. It is His (unchanging) image, and not our own, that we should hold tightly within ourselves. It seems to me that anything else leaves us vulnerable to Satan’s mirror attacks.

We as His spiritual children are each astonishingly precious, wholly unique, equally special and imperfect works-in-progress (ignorant, immature, sinful and entirely dependent by design), and we will forever be dearly loved and desperately wanted by our Father — no matter what!

I believe that seeing ourselves any other way is evidence of the need for a self-image adjustment to remove a vulnerability. Please, consider this seriously, revisit it often, and keep taking it to the foot of the cross. If we allow our self-image to drift away from the Lord’s view even a little, then I believe we are being lured by a deception, and we are following the enemy.

Truly it seems that our overall success as the bride of Christ depends heavily on our willingness to completely let go of the habit of seeing ourselves, to always seek His face, locking our eyes to His and to surrender fully to His deeply loving, humble, generous, serving Spirit in us.

We must solidify the self-image of truth within us, come to Him as little children and humbly melt away into the Lord in sweet surrender. Then, Satan’s mirrors will hold no power.

Please, ask His Holy Spirit to alert you to the mirrors.

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Journal Entry, June 24, 2013

This morning I dreamed that I was in the house that I am in now and either someone here said, or the understanding simply came to me, “They are coming for you.”

I walked over to the large dining room window and looked out, but what I saw outside was the long gravel road on the ranch of my childhood. Slowly proceeding up the gravel lane toward the house was what looked like an dark olive-green military jeep and truck with a red logo of some kind on the door.

They were traveling slowly and I knew in my spirit that this was to give me time to prepare. I thought about gathering onto my bed all the library books that I had checked out for my mom and grandmother. That way, they could easily find them and return them, which would allow me to keep my word to the library. I couldn’t think of much else to do except change my clothes and put on my shoes. I felt peace.

Then I woke up…

Excerpt from page 30 of Deborah Melissa Moller’s book, The Final Call:

“I speak to you in night visions. I want to interact with you and want you to take notes. Write down, My child, everything I give you in a dream and then pray to Me and ask for the interpretation. You will be amazed at how I show you awesome happenings. Take seriously what I show you in the night and write it down, for you will not understand it immediately, but as time goes by it will happen and you will be amazed.”

“Do you want to hear Me speak? I speak in dreams also. Do not despise them, because dreams are from Me. Ask Me for the interpretation and I will teach you great things. Above all, focus on Me. Don’t make an idol of dreams.”

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Journal Entry, June 17, 2013

I had a dream this morning.

For several weeks now I have been experiencing a strange sleep problem where I can not fall to sleep for hours, and when I finally do, I become stuck in a semi-lucid dream-state where I am half-aware that I am either talking or praying, or reading strange words aloud in a repeating cycle, like a kind of low-grade torment. This has left me incredibly tired and shaky and easily mentally confused. During this time I keep losing weight. But, I am not concerned because I keep handing to Jesus everything, including my mind, my body, my sleep and my dreams, and I trust Him.

Early this morning I finally had a mostly-normal dream. I am still struggling mentally with my awareness and memory, and can not seem to retain much detail for very long.

In this dream, several Star Trek figures came under attack by an enemy weapon. Among those struck down were William Shatner who played Captain Kirk (He was standing by a lake) and Leonard Nimoy who plays Mr. Spock (he was standing by a stagnant river). There were others struck down, but I did not recognize them. Each one happened to be near a body of water. Once struck down, they were left there by the enemy to die. But, in each instance, someone pulled their bodies into the water, leaving them floating there to slowly heal while unconscious.

At the end of the healing process, I and someone who looked Vulcan came to collect Mr. Spock in the river. Prior to losing consciousness, Spock had applied a healing patch to the back of his right hand. The Vulcan with me thought this was silly, a human remedy. But, when he removed that patch, he noticed that it had worked. Leonard, in faith, had done the right thing.

Leonard then regained consciousness. He was weak and shaky and began to speak. I can’t remember what he said, but the pain in his voice spoke of sorrow and weariness and vulnerability because of his feeble, aged body and lack of strength. He had no choice but to trust us and surrender himself into our hands.

As I slowly pulled him through the water, I reach down and lifted him up, gently supporting him as I held him close. A great compassion filled my heart and I tenderly spoke the words, “I will carry thee.”

I woke up and cried and prayed for Leonard Nimoy.

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What’s In A Name?

As it is written in Luke 1:31, when the angel Gabriel informed Mary that she would conceive a son through the Holy Spirit, she was instructed to name Him “Jesus.” But in actuality, what she heard Gabriel speak was the Hebrew name “Yahushua” pronounced Yah-hoo-shoo’-ah, which in Hebrew means “God saves.” When this name was later translated from Hebrew to Greek, then from Greek to Latin and finally from Latin to English, it eventually ended up “Jesus.” (Here is a detailed article for those interested in the evolution of the Lord’s name.)

So why does this even matter? Is not our Lord humble? Will He not answer to any of His many names and titles spoken in any language? Of course He will. I only mention it for the following reason…

On page 46 of the free ebook I Am Coming! (Volume 6) you will find the following prophecy which was given to us by God back in January of 2012:

“I, God, your Heavenly Father, call on everyone to pray from today in the Name of Yahushua, My Beloved Son. The reason for this is that the antichrist will use this name: ‘Jesus Christ’ as his identity in the tribulation, once My bride is gone. It will be hard, hard times, as never seen on this earth. I have already called many of My bride to pray in My Son’s original Name: Yahushua. Make it a habit My beloved, the Name Yahushua has much strength and is extremely pleasing to Me, your God.”

Okay. So, if it pleases our Father, the giver of every good thing (both the common and the miraculous), that we should come before Him and make our requests in the name that He actually gave His one and only Son, then, in humble obedience, that is just what I will do, because I love Him and desire very much to please Him. After all, what else can you give a loving Father who already has everything?

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Journal Entry, April 13, 2013

I had a dream…

In this dream, I found myself standing in some buffet-style, no-name, fast-food restaurant located in some run-of-the-mill, no-name strip mall. The atmosphere felt sterile and spiritually dead, and I felt joyless and heartsick just being there.

The restaurant was filled with many bare tables and uncomfortable, plastic chairs. The meager buffet was located along the very back wall. Near one end of the buffet was a short hallway leading to restrooms and an unlocked exit used by employees.

It was late afternoon. There were only a few stragglers left, still eating their lunch off of flimsy, paper plates. My brother walked up to me and reported that he had just witnessed a man and a woman walk out the back door with plates of food. Just then I realized that my brother and I were employees, and that I bore the burden of a manager.

I sighed. I was troubled. In my spirit I knew that, as a manager, I must faithfully represent the selfish interests, and enforce the regulations, of my profit-hungry employers. Yet, at the same time, I also knew that they were under tremendous stress because of the high rent demanded by the even-more-greedy owner of the strip mall. I felt both disappointed in them, and sorry for them at the same time.

I then found myself viewing a security monitor as my brother replayed the security tape of the camera that covered the buffet and hallway. Then all at once, I was no longer watching the monitor, but was actually their in the past, standing next to the buffet.

I watched as the couple snuck in through the back door. The young woman’s voice and appearance was very similar to the actress Keri Lynn Pratt. She was only a teenager but had already lived a very troubled life and was now surviving day-to-day on the streets. The young man appeared to be a few years older and also homeless, though new to street life. She was coaching him; teaching him her survival techniques; revealing to him her secrets. They left with their food and went to a nearby, secluded, picnic table meant for use by the employees of an adjoining store.

I sighed again. For them, I felt compassion and heartache. I wanted to just let them go. But, I knew that my hands were tied. I was bound by the terms of my employment. I had to keep my word. I must confront them. I also knew they had not the money to pay. I thought about just paying for their food myself, but I found I had no wallet.

As my brother and I, along with a security officer, approached the picnic table, I saw that the young man was not present, though his plate of food was still there. The young woman stood up, looking concerned. Her back was to a brick wall. The officer moved to the opposite end of the table to prevent her escape. I felt sick.

I asked the young woman where her friend had gone. She said that he went to find a restroom. I then moved closer as I informed her that her theft had been captured on a security camera.

Her face suddenly had a look of intense pain. She fell to the ground, curled up in a ball and began sobbing loudly. I felt her shame and her pain. I hurt for her. I knelt down over her, put my hand gently on her shoulder and spoke softly to her. “If you will just pay now, then I promise you, I will make sure that this all ends here, and you will go free.” But I knew she had not the means; not even a penny to her name. My heart was breaking.

Suddenly, I felt a hope. And, for some reason, I leaned in and whispered in her ear, “I will keep repeating that offer until the very last possible moment.” Then, I gently kissed her hair, and I woke up.

As I laid their thinking, still caught in the swirl of my emotions, I had a very strong sense that this dream stood as a shadow; a kind of metaphor for the real truth; a parable of our spiritual reality.

This woman had no way to pay for her transgression, no matter how much time she was given before being tried, convicted and sentenced. I wanted so badly to help her, but I also could not pay the price for her. If only we would cry out to Jesus, even in the midst of our trouble, before it’s too late, the payment would come. I just know it.

He hurts for us too. He cries with us. He will keep extending to us His hand until the last possible moment. There isn’t much time left. I wish we all would listen. Why won’t we listen?

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Journal Entry, April 6, 2013

I had a strange dream this morning…

I was standing in an empty, old, wooden barn on a small, barren farm. The landscape was bleak, cast in a dull-gray light, like just before a rain storm. The farm was surrounded by new, rolling, barbed wire, like a circle of gray brambles. (I wondered at its purpose. Why would anyone go to so much effort to encompass such a barren place?)

I was standing with someone in the barn, but I can’t describe him because I never turned to looked at him.

About six or eight people came into the barn. They looked like Koreans. They were dressed like military. They were boasting that we were now their prisoners, but they were really more intent on showing off in front of him, my companion. (I wondered if perhaps it was they who had deployed the barbed wire. All that work and material just to keep two people prisoner? No, that seemed silly.)

The people were displaying their might to him. Their might was a tank containing pressurized air, like a SCUBA tank. It was a very heavy, very rusty, thick-iron tank about eight feet long, four feet in diameter, laying on its side with a plug in the end. The people boasted that they would now use it to destroy us.

One man took a sledgehammer and struck the plug, popping it like a cork. The tank then began to fly wildly around inside the barn, just like when a party balloon is filled with air and then let loose.

The people looked shocked. They all suddenly jumped onto the tank, determined to control it. But, their efforts were in vain. Yet, they would not let go. The tank flew out of the barn. I could here a lot of crashing and banging, then finally silence.

My companion and I ran out of the barn toward the tank. The people were still holding on to it and each other. The barbed wire had entangled them. They were bloody and badly broken. Two were dead. I was horrified. Then, I awoke.

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Beyond Just Knowing

Within the worship-language of the Christian community at large, especially the lyrics of many contemporary Christian songs, I’ve noticed a consistent pattern. I’ve observed that emphasis is routinely placed, not just on God’s unearnable grace, but on His perfect holiness, and on His impressive glory — that His strength is almighty, that He shines brighter than a thousand suns, and so forth.

Maybe it’s my autism, but to me, statements like these represent just the plain and simple truth which, while important to remember, is not directly experienced in this life–except perhaps by a divinely-select few. Yes, God is light, and He is holy, holy, holy, which is very good news for us. Yes, I will be overwhelmed by His holiness and brightness when I finally meet Him in heaven one day. Yes, God is all powerful, which also tells me that all power belongs to Him. And yes, I do find that His all-mightiness brings me feelings of comfort and security.

But for me, these are all foundational truths, locked in from the very beginning — baby food. It’s like listening to doctors continually emphasize the amazing fact that we hear sound through our ears. “Okay. Yeah. It is amazing. I can see that. I got that in kindergarten. So, now what?”

Because these standard confessions of glory-amazement seem to have become such a repeated routine, I now suspect that they are what is being used as the unspoken, yet universally understood, contemporary proof of one’s genuine Christianness — as though you’re not truly on board as a Christian today unless you are observed to be appropriately and continually awed by these basic truths.

If this is indeed the case, then I find that this disingenuous awe disturbs my spirit greatly. It feels like just another Christian public-badge. But I humbly admit, I could be wrong. What if this constant awe is somehow genuine? Then, why do I not feel it too?

Perhaps I’m not as continually awed simply because my current, autistic perspective of God is firmly and comfortably rooted in the concept of infinity. God said that with Him all things are possible, (Matthew 19:26) and that He can do infinitely more than we can ever imagine. (Ephesians 3:20) This tells me that every aspect of God is infinite, not just in a linear scope, but in dimensions beyond my ability to comprehend; He isn’t just a God beyond my wildest dreams. He is so far beyond my wildest dreams, that His beyond-ness is beyond my wildest dreams.

So, while it is impressive that God parted the Red Sea, I find His creation of this infinite, physical universe to be vastly more impressive. And even then, I suspect that in God’s spiritual house, this universe is merely our playpen located somewhere within Jesus’ room. I can’t even imagine what God’s other rooms might contain. It boggles the mind.

So you see, however big we imagine God to be, we are guaranteed to come up short, and that for me is also just one more plain and simple truth — more foundational baby food.

But God doesn’t want us to stop at simply reminding ourselves about His greatness repeatedly in thought or song. Our Father yearns for us to move forward into the hardy meat of relationship; for each to experience Him in the most intimate way, for He is Love, Itself, in all Its richness and variety, and He freely, humbly offers us His whole heart to reach out and touch. If only we would, for then we would feel the truth of His tender mercy for us in every beat and be forever, permanently changed.

Though comforting, being repeatedly reminded that my Creator is all knowing, seeing, light, power and holiness, is not what brings me to my knees.

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The True Flavor of Salt

The fragrance of God is not the smell of brand new carpet, polished wooden pews and musty hymnals. It is the scent of moist earth and honey, and of roses in the rain. It is a fragrance never stagnant, but full of life. It is not of men, but of Him.

A view of God does not come just through the colors of stained glass, but by gazing deeply into His starry expanse from high atop His mighty mountains, and then marveling at the ephemeral craftsmanship of one solitary, silent snowflake. And finally from seeing that all these amazing things combined can not even hold a candle to a single, tender act of merciful kindness. For it is in His very image that we are made. Don’t you see?

Loving God is not depositing bills in a collection plate. It is picking up your neighbor when he is lying in the dust and speaking encouraging words of life into his soul. Love does not turn its back, but bends its back. Love is – a burden carried in a world fallen. This is the flavor of salt.

God never turns out to be who we choose to believe He is. But rather, He is as He gradually reveals Himself to be. It is He, Himself, who shows us, in His own time, in His own way, through His own words and through His own creation. The “who” of God is not something that man can just decide. This view is something for which we must humbly ask, patiently and passionately seek, and to which we must be lovingly guided.

God’s richness is greater that mankind’s imagination can contain. And it is His privilege and great joy to gradually reveal Himself to His seeking children now and throughout eternity.

We need not fear the things of God which we can not yet see and do not yet know. For He promises that, once we taste Him, we will be blown away. The true flavor of God — is very good, indeed.

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A Sacrificing Love

There are those among my family and friends who have declared for decades now that I consistently sacrifice far too much. They say that this is unhealthy, and that I ought to do more for myself, that I should take time to discover what truly makes me happy — that I really need to get a life.

For many, many years I have actually carried around a small measure of guilt over this. After all, they speak as though they truly understand this simple fact-of-life which my autistic mind is somehow just not getting. I suppose from their perspective my life must seem pathetic.

It’s not as though I’m deliberately trying to live an imbalanced life. Yet even so, as odd as I may seem, I must acknowledge that I am the way that I am. And the truth of it, which they just don’t get, is that I find no joy at all in doing for myself. Any seemingly pleasurable distraction in which I might engage, ultimately makes not the slightest dent in that empty hollow of my heart.

It seems the only thing in my power which can kindle any embers of joy for me is to bring joy and relief to others by simply loving them the best way that I know how — through the constancy and quality of my service. In my heart, this is what I’ve found has value. Once you’ve asked this autistic guy to do something for you, you can then count on him to give you his best, to represent you well and to look out for you and your interests, no matter who you are. I’ve noticed that people are often surprised by the lengths to which I will go for them.

So, tell me Doctor. What exactly is wrong with me? Am I diseased or just from another planet? Why does my love language seem so different? Why does it make some people uncomfortable such that they would want to push it away?

From my deep and secret places, wherein I search for serious truth, I have asked myself “where else can I seek to find the joy and happiness that I sorely lack?” And as I listened hard for the answer, from out of that empty hollow in my heart came a tiny whisper carried on a cold and lonely wind which said — “What you need is what you give.” …What?

Upon deeper reflection, I was eventually shown the meaning of this truth. It’s the Golden Rule in reverse.

The Golden Rule was given to us by Jesus who said “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.” (Matthew 7:12) This is very similar to what Jesus refers to as the second greatest commandment, which is simply to “Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Matthew 22:39)

So the reverse of this Golden Rule would be, “In the same way that you love others, you then need to be loved in return.” Or in other words, if you are truly keeping the Golden Rule, then “What you give will be what you need.” But sadly, I’ve discovered that the kind of love which I give and need is seldom found these days, at least along the paths upon which I tread.

If Jesus, who so dearly loves us, is meant to serve as our example of the Golden Rule in action, then, having considered what He endured to save us, and having seen just the tiniest gimps of the lengths to which He goes for us both in heaven and on earth, I now believe that there is no such thing as sacrificing too much for the sake of love. I believe this even though I’ve yet to soar upon that uplifting joy of consistently being loved this way in return — I say this even though it could mean that I may never “get a life.”

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